It's been awhile....
I didn't realize just how long it has been, I intended to make this a weekly blog, is it the road to hell that is paved with good intentions??
It has been a jacked up wonderful year. Jacked up - Covid of course and my relatiuonship of 5 years ended. Kind of pains me to say this but the relationship ending was probably the best thing that could have happened to me. I needed a kick in the ass to stop avoiding...me. Nothing like losing a relationship and being told you have to shelter in place to do just that.
I am that woman that gives up who she is, what she likes, her friends, what she wants for herself, when she enters a relationship. I am a love earner, a recovering one! Funny, but I actually don't like women like that....and I am, was, one. I say "was" hopefully, not in a relationship currently but certainly I've learned,right?!?
I was aware of this before, I even said to last BF, don't let me lose myself....yea, like it was his responsibility. Ugh, adulthood is hard, relationships are even harder....I really love my dog!
Anyway, the wonderful part. I have spent the last several months, crying, dancing, laughing, crying some more, feeling sorry for myself, angry, more laughing, meditating, more dancing, a tiny bit of coloring :) and lots more crying. And I feel fantastic!!
I actually read the inner child book I bought years ago and sat and cried as I meditated and held my 10 year old self. (In my mind, I am not totally nuts!). I did shadow work, journaling, brain dumping...those tools I have spoken about in another blog, I opened up the chest and used some of them.
Then end of September I started a 10 week 200 hour Yoga certification. I know that it was the catalist of bringing together all of my work plus the new material I learned and the people I shared the journey with, along with our instructor, who is a phenomenal woman!
My horoscope, I am a Leo, for November said that it would feel like I would be waking up from a long dream or a hibernation and it did! I feel more myself than I think I have ever. I know myself, I trust myself and more importantly than any of that, I love myself.
My life isn't perfect, far from, but that's ok. I know that I can face whatever comes up head on. And when I fall down, I get back up faster and stronger.
The picture is of the tattoo I got November 1st, it is a great reminder for me to follow through on those intentions that I set this year, it's December, better late than never! My life is different and will continue to be so!
You'll be seeing lots more of me!
Peace & Love,